'Respect Life' Means More Than Just Ending Abortion

“I know the plans I have for you” (Jeremiah 29:11).

October has traditionally been designated as Respect Life Month.  Many people immediately think “abortion” when they hear this phrase, and rightly so. We live in a time when many believe that a child in the womb has no rights; therefore, they can choose to terminate the child’s life. For some, this has just become a topic of debate; there is a tendency to forget that this choice truly impacts people’s lives in very dramatic ways.

In 1957, I was born to a single mother. She was a college student, and I am sure she was frightened (as most girls would be) by the prospect of an unwanted pregnancy and filled with the sheer terror of having to share this news with her parents. The Roe vs. Wade decision was 15 years away.

I have no way of knowing whether she would have considered abortion had it been a viable option. What I do know is that God provided her the strength and support to deal with the social disapproval that went along with being an unwed mother in the 1950s.

At the time of my birth, another young woman – married – also contemplated the birth of a child. But she was fearful that her desire would never become a reality. She had been waiting for five long years to have a baby. On that June day, God fulfilled her and her husband’s hearts’ desires. Shortly after my birth, Catholic Charities contacted that young couple. The adoption proceeded, and we became a family in August.

My mom often joked that five years was a long time to be pregnant, probably the longest on record! She often described our first meeting with all the details of a delivery experience. She told of the great anticipation that was welling up inside before our first meeting; of imagining what I would look like; and of the indescribable joy she felt the first time our eyes met. She also said that when my arms reached out to her during our first meeting, she knew that I was who she was waiting for.

None of us understood the plan that was unfolding, but God did. He assures us that “I know the plans I have for you … plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” I am reminded daily that he has a plan for each and every one of us.

I became a daughter, sister and niece, and brought unspeakable joy a dying grandfather’s first grandchild. In my lifetime, God has called me to active ministry as a Catholic school teacher, a youth minister and a director of religious education. I am continually humbled by his calls and pray that in some small way I am fulfilling His vision – always pointing to Him.

I am a wife to Joe and mom to Lynn. My life has been full, meaningful and filled with purpose at all its stages.

I wish that I could sit for a moment with each woman facing the choice my own biological mother faced, and offer her comfort, gentle words, support and a glimpse at all the plans God has for her unborn child – and for her. I would try to provide her with the direction that would allow her to make the most loving choice – not only for her child but also for herself.

It saddens me that many of our pro-life conversations fail to include discussion about also saving the life of the mother. Do we ever think of these women and what they are left to face – often on their own? Society would have us believe the myth that there is no emotional and psychological harm or lasting effects of abortion; that is false. I think we all know very well that the choice made by one has consequences for all.

In my heart I only feel love for the women and men who have suffered the devastation of abortion. I pray daily that they feel the overwhelming, unconditional love of our Lord Jesus and his great mercy. I give thanks to our Catholic communities that have committed themselves through Rachel’s Vineyard to reach out in love to those in pain and provide the opportunities necessary for healing to begin.

May God bless the work of the thousands who stand up daily for the sacredness of life by being the collective voice for the unborn, the poor or the inmate on death row.

I stand in awe with unending gratitude for the great gift I received from two women who chose to move past their own hurts and choose love. Their examples bore collective witness to the unconditional love that Jesus Christ has for me and all of his children!