The Family Language
She’s a lovely young woman teaching kindergartners now, but 25 years ago she was a delightful toddler sitting in the back seat of the family sedan.
When she was asked where she would like to go for dinner, she answered in her precious little voice, “Let’s just see where the car takes us, Daddy.”
My husband, Steve, and I were sitting in a seaside restaurant years ago, enjoying the ambiance and the shrimp, when we heard a 12-year-old boy addressing his parents. In a loud voice, he proclaimed, “You KNOW I don’t like the ocean!”
We looked at each other, and we started laughing. And we kept laughing. His words bore deep into our brains, and they became the rejoinder to everything we love to do. “You know I don’t like taking walks — watching the sun set — having dessert.” And, yes, “you KNOW I don’t like the ocean!”
And then there was the time when the two of us were sitting on a bench near a small lake when we heard a husband and wife squabbling. There was a light drizzle, and he wanted to take a boat out on the water. She kept saying that it was going to rain, and he kept telling her that he didn’t care. Finally, he shouted, “What are they going to do? Call the police?”
It was another funny phrase that found itself in our family language collection. I think every family has one. A phrase becomes shorthand, and everyone immediately understands the unique meaning of the words, which make no sense to non-family members.
As Catholics we also have our own family language.
Think of the “Great Amen.” It is sung after the miracle of the Consecration, when bread and wine have been transformed into the Body and Blood of Jesus. It’s a prayer of joy said right before we process up the aisle to receive the Eucharist. As Catholics, when we use that phrase we connect with that sacred moment in the Mass in a very special way.
Reconciliation is a sacrament that heals us and leaves our souls as pure as freshly fallen snow. Once you have experienced the saving grace of Reconciliation, you are never the same, and the word has a new meaning in your life.
And then there is Lent. Unless you have walked through those 40 solemn days, it’s probably hard to understand the term. When I was a young girl, we were encouraged to give something up, our sacrifice reminding us of the time Jesus spent in the desert.
Now I’m in my mid-60s, so Lent is a little different. It has become a time of quiet reflection, a time to withdraw from the busyness of the world. During Lent we are usually on the cusp of spring; it’s a time when southern Indiana is preparing to burst into its first bloom. It’s the time when we quietly await the triumph of the Resurrection.
Words and phrases have meaning, in families and in faith communities. When we embrace them, they help to explain things in a quick and unique way.
These are some of my favorites.
What are yours?
