Reflections On Dolores Walker And Others Who Have Touched My Life

Upon hearing the news that Dolores Walker, the mother of Judicial Vicar Father Ken Walker, had passed away last week, the following quote by an anonymous author immediately came to mind: “Our lives are shaped by those who love us and by those who refuse to love us.”

I had the wonderful privilege of meeting Dolores back in 1977 when I received my first full-time assignment as associate pastor of St. Simon Parish in Washington. I was a newly ordained, “green-behind-the ears” priest and Dolores was the head nurse at Prairie Village Nursing Home. Not only did she make sure that the residents received the best of care, she also had time to take care of this rather nervous priest the first time he took communion to the residents on a weekly basis. Dolores made me feel right at home and at ease, showing me around the premises, introducing me to the residents and taking time to pray with us when I gave them communion. 

Although I was “on my own” after that first visit, Dolores was always there if I needed any kind of special help or to introduce me to a new Catholic resident who had moved into the facility. She was thrilled when I offered to celebrate Mass there on different occasions because she knew that caring for the residents involved both physical and spiritual components.  Dolores was always friendly and glad to see me. I will never, ever forget her many kindnesses to me; and will remain appreciative to her for the help she offered me as a young priest learning the ropes of priestly ministry. 

Over the last 36 years, we would meet one another at different functions. It was like the years had never passed by. Although I had not seen her in her last years, I would often tell Fr. Ken how much I admired his mom and would ask him to assure her of my love and prayers. Unfortunately, parish duties prevented me from participating in her funeral last Friday, but Dolores would have wanted me to be busy about doing the Lord’s work. That’s the kind of person she was.

One of the most remarkable gifts of priesthood is the deep respect that priests have for the parents of their peers, and the affinity that exists among their parents. We tend to be there for one another at the tough moments of life. 

Some years ago, Mary Ann Zenthoefer, mother of Christ the King, Evansville, pastor Father Alex Zenthoefer, tried to organize a prayer group of priests’ parents at the Little Sisters of the Poor. My parents were residents there at that time and they enjoyed getting together with other parents. Maybe coming from a smaller diocese with fewer priests helps us get to know one another a little better compared to being part of the presbyterate of, for example, New York City. 

My family home was also always a place where seminarians would gather to get away from the seminary when they came to Evansville from St. Meinrad. Even when I left to study in Austria for four years, my theology classmates (along with Father Thomas Ostdick) would continue to stop in on a Saturday night to visit. Many a priest would share a meal at our family table – everyone was welcome no matter what time they showed up before supper. I know that other parents opened their hearts and their homes to priests and seminarians like my parents did.

I think this was one of the things that influenced me in becoming a priest when I was just a boy. Every priest and sister was welcomed into our home. Our parish associates would always come down to visit, have a meal, play cards, have a beer and relax. Father Gerard Ellspermann’s mother lived across the street from us. Since he was a classmate of my mom’s at St. Joseph School, he would always stop in to visit when he visited his mom. 

I never once heard my parents say a negative word about a priest or a sister while I was growing up. There is no doubt in my mind that their respect for priests and sisters made a great impact on my young mind and spirit. I owe a debt of gratitude to them how God used them in calling me to be a priest. I would be willing to say that the witness of parents played a role in every priest’s vocational choice. 

Dolores Walker was another one of those exceptional people who had a great respect for priests, which I was privileged to experience firsthand  – “May the angels lead her into paradise; may the martyrs come and welcome her and take her to that holy city, the new and eternal Jerusalem.”