Lent Is Not Meant To Be Easy
Lent reminds me of things that are difficult. Fasting, prayer and almsgiving are not meant to be easy; and I like to think of these sacrifices as chiseling us into people more like Jesus, more like the people we are meant to be. Forgiving others also isn’t easy, and I think it goes hand in hand with Lenten practices and the spirit of preparing for Easter.
Last year, husband and I listened to a podcast called “Forgiveness” in the series “Catholic Stuff You Should Know”by Father Michael O’Loughlin and Father Nathan Goebe. Father O’Loughlin, a Byzantine priest, shared that his community has a ritual during Lent that focuses on forgiveness and humility. The superior comes before the brothers and asks forgiveness for his sins. The brothers verbally express forgiveness, and each also asks for forgiveness from the community. Father O’Loughlin recommends completing something similar within the family unit. Shortly after listening to this podcast, my husband and I began asking for forgiveness from each other every Friday evening, starting before we were married. We recall specific instances in which we’ve sinned and also apologize for anything we’ve done to hurt the other. This has become such an important part of our marriage. It definitely isn’t easy admitting my faults. But every Friday, I have another way of humbling myself and sharing my love for my husband. This ritual makes me want to be a better person so I can better love my husband and serve God. This act also facilitates trust and growth in our relationship and helps me strive to be the best person I can be.
St. Ignatius encourages an examen at least once daily by taking silent prayer to review our day, notice the Lord’s presence, thank God for his blessings, and become aware of our shortcomings and sins with a goal to do better the next day. In Matthew 5:20-26, Jesus says that we are “liable to judgement … and to fiery Gehenna” for being angry with our brother or saying “you fool.” This reminds me of the need to be acutely aware of “what I have done and what I have failed to do,” and of the many ways I may have failed to be the person God created me to be each day.
Forgiveness is powerful, and a focus on it during Lent can help us humble ourselves and rid ourselves of what may be standing in the way of closer union with the Lord. Forgiving ourselves and others can be difficult but is crucial for our spiritual lives. And needless to say, going to confession and receiving this great sacrament is more than important. As we sacrifice this Lent and prepare for Easter, we can support each other as families, friends, and the church community to keep our eyes on the passion, death, and resurrection of Christ.
