Learning How To Trust God

I have a bit of difficulty trusting God.

I don’t doubt God’s absolute love for me and desire for my every good. I simply don’t understand how I can trust him. Joseph Ratzinger (Pope-Emeritus Benedict XVI) explains in his “Introduction to Christianity” that, “As the arena of love [the world] is also the playground of freedom….” (p. 160). He continues that because of God’s pure, unadulterated creative love, “the supreme factor in the world is not cosmic necessity but freedom” (p. 159), and “the incalculability implicit in it is an essential part of the world” (p. 160).

So … how can I trust that the net results of others’ possibly immoral choices will lead to what is best for me?

I was looking for the wrong kind of trust. I was hoping I could put in my effort and then trust God to bring about a specific result, like a good grade on a test or a meaningful discussion with a friend. Instead, I need to play the long game better.

Not everything that happens to me will lead directly to my best interests; due to the incalculability of the world, not every occurrence in my life will be objectively good, regardless of the trust I may have in God. But in his love and goodness, God takes everything and orients it toward the good. As the Catechism states in paragraph 311, even the incalculability that lends itself to moral evil is permitted “because [God] respects the freedom of his creatures and, mysteriously, knows how to derive good from it.”

The specific details of our lives fall very much in the category of incalculable, and are dependent on our choices and others’. Due to this conditionality, I don’t know that we can trust in a specific result. However, God’s love is unconditional. He desires the deepest relationship with us, so he is constantly pouring out every grace and affection on us, trying to draw us closer to him.

We can trust that God will never stop seeking us. We can trust that God will never stop giving us every opportunity to choose him. And once we choose him, the specific details do not matter. All that matters is that we love.

To work on my ability to trust God, I’ve been praying a favorite novena of St. Padre Pio’s that repeats the line, “Oh Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place all my trust in You,” and I realize now why I’m placing my trust in the Sacred Heart. If I can recognize God’s boundless love for me, trusting him will come naturally. If I can acknowledge the infinite depths of God’s care and concern for me, there will be no doubt in my mind that he will guide me to the fullness of life, regardless of the specifics.